Sometimes. Part of growing up is realizing that some people aren't worth the effort. Aren't worth the hurt and abuse and the constant trying and crying. Some people won't ever open their eyes and see the way their actions actually take a toll on you. They won't ever notice, they'll never understand and when they do. No, if they do. Won't it be too late? You know. I grew up in a church. Grew up hearing about God's love and his grace, and His forgiveness for us. How we must forgive others for the things they do and say to us. In this, I don't think God necessarily means we need to forgive them and continuously put our hearts on our sleeves and walk right back into the battle. That would be a foolish move to walk into a hungry lions den with meat in your pockets expecting them not to strike. Being a Christian you should forgive people for their actions, their misrepresentations, their thoughts and their harmful sayings, but I also think that as a Christian, as God's heavenly child, I think he also gives you the choice whether or not you need to continue to expose yourself to them. I have decided that after much abuse and harmful words, after so much stress and tears, it is MY time to check out of this particular battle. God tells me to love you always, and I will -But this time. This time-I will love you from the distant sidelines. God is our Father, yes. But God does not expect us to put ourselves into harms way. Instead of looking to that person you thought you needed, look to God. God will always be there for us and that is what truly matters.

“But if serving the LORD seems undesirable to you, then choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve, whether the gods your ancestors served beyond the Euphrates, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land you are living. But as for me and my household, we will serve the LORD.”” Joshua 24:15 NIV

Simplicity is so complicated. Love is impossible. Commitment even more so. And trying? Completely overrated. Trust? Hard to come by, but you don't seem to care.

You know, people don't ever seem to realize that what they have IS worth holding onto. They don't seem to realize that the trust they have within someone, is- indeed a miracle. A new beginning, a new hope. Why do they have no problem misusing, and misplacing that trust? They act like it's easy to come by. Easy to regain. They act, pretend and lie to cover up what they did. Act like it didn't happen. When confronted, they dance around the facts and make it seem like they're the victim in the situation, not the cause. You know what I learned and continue learning from situations like these? Nothing, NOTHING, is worth your tears, or your trust and frustration, or even your time except Jesus. Only God can take your trust, and your feelings and heart and use it to help us -help us to grow closer to Him. Only God can make it worth our effort. So next time when you're in a situation where someone in this world-life lets you down, don't let it get to you. God is the only thing that we should hold that close to our hearts. He won't abandon us and one day, one day if we hold out and let Him make the decisions in our life (-the decisions that make us who we are in Him, ) God will bring us to the perfect person that was made for us. The person made to help us glorify HIM!

Matthew:18:15 "If your brother sins, go and show him his fault when the two of you are alone. If he listens to you, you have regained your brother." A good friend showed me this verse tonight. Thanks!